HELGA
by Lauralogan80
Summary: Because the Title Hey Helga! Is taken. Short role reversal one shot.


HELGA - One shot

(Okay, so here's my twist. Set in an Alternate Reality, it's going to get a bit weird and creepy at times, because guys stalking girls is always weirder…)

…

…

Helga hit her alarm and rolled over, not wanting to get out of bed and start the day. She laid there a moment, relishing in the warm comfort of her blankets, smiling and stretching. Reluctantly, she finally sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes and reaching out to open her curtains. Sunlight streaming in made her smile more. It was going to be a nice day!

Hoping out of bed, she walked to her wardrobe and opened the doors, looking in at her clothes. She grabbed her signature pink dress, then went to her drawers to grab her unmentionables, a top, and socks, then went and took a shower. Halfway through she heard her father banging on the door.

"Hurry up in there Olga!" he called through the door. Helga rolled her eyes and sighed.

"In a minute dad!" she called back, hurrying to rinse the conditioner out of her hair. When she was finished, she dried herself off, and dressed, then rushed down the stairs to get breakfast. Her mother was asleep at the kitchen table, so Helga just went and made herself breakfast, then lunch for the day.

"Later Mom, bye Dad!" she shouted, then left, closing the door behind her to walk to the bus stop and wait for the bus to school.

…..

…..

"Ohayo, Helga!" Phoebe chirped, as Helga took her place by her best friend.

"Ohayōgozaimasu, Phoebe," she replied smiling at her best friend. She suddenly made a face and reached to the back of her head to pull out something wet and gross, no doubt. "Ack!"

"Oh, Helga, are you still having problems with that boy?" she asked.

Helga nodded, dropping the spit ball on the floor, and resisting the urge to gag. So. Gross!

"I just don't understand it, Phoebe. I ignore him, he's mean. I'm nice to him, he's mean. not matter what I do, he just keeps bugging me!" she told her, exasperated. "I just don't get it!"

Phoebe smiled. "Maybe he likes you?" she suggested.

"No. I think he ha-ugh!" she reached around to find two more spit balls in her hair. She turned around in her chair to glare at the boy. He was cute, in a weird kind of way, Helga thought. But what a terrible personality!

She stared at his football shaped head, jelly bean green eyes and cornflower blonde hair. 'Why can't he just be nice for a change?'. Helga put up with it, feeling bad for the boy. He lived with his grandparents in a boarding house, and his parents travelled all the time, so they were rarely around. And when they were, they never really bothered with him. 'An orpahn with parents,' Helga thought. 'Kind of like me.'

"Take a picture, goat eared loser, it will last longer," he said, smirking at her.

She sighed and looked down at her hands, which had turned into fists.

"It's a shame," Phoebe said, looking back as well. "His friend Gerald is so nice. What does he see in Arnold?"

"Who knows Pheeb's, who knows."

….

….

Arnold was the last boy off the bus, even his best friend rushed into the school ahead of him. He looked around, then ducked down beside the concrete stairs that led to the big double doors of PS118. Checking again, and seeing no one, he reached into his jumper and pulled out an oval gold locket and opened it. Inside was a picture of Helga Pataki, smiling brightly and happily. He'd cut Phoebe out of the picture. Gerald had given him a copy with a silent I-know-what's-up-with-you look.

"Oh, Helga, my love,

Why must I be so cruel to you?

You're the Juliet to my Romeo,

And yet, I treat you like dirt."

He sighed and looked up, going to tuck his locket away.

"Argh!" he shouted, falling over backwards. Standing in front of him, giving him a strange look was Helga Pataki herself.

"Arnold? What are you doing down here?" she asked.

"I-I-I dropped something," he stuttered. Then he recovered. "Not that it's any of your beeswax. Speaking of wax, Cyclops called, he wants his eyebrow back, hahahahaha!"

With that he stormed past her, pushing her out of his way.

"See ya later goat ears!" he called over his shoulder.

"Whatever you say, Arnold," she said, shaking her head.


End file.
